My feelings are valid!

If you’ve followed any female influencer who prioritizes self-love and self-care for any length of time, you’ve probably heard this phrase before. Or perhaps you’ve even used it yourself. We live in a culture that highly prizes, validates, and affirms one’s feelings, whether they be good or bad. And this culture is even trying to train us to always speak in a way that will never leave anyone out, offend anyone, or hurt anyone’s feelings. Rene Descartes, a French philosopher who lived in the seventeenth century, once said, “I think, therefore I am.”^[1] But is appears our culture has changed this to, “I feel, therefore I am.”

Many people today find their identity in how they feel, so they want their feelings to be validated because that then validates their identity – who they are as a person. But the problem with this phrase is that not all feelings are valid. Therefore, as believers, we cannot and should not affirm those feelings which are in fact invalid.